Tuesday, July 06, 2010
Signs he's ready to leave
Worried you’re heading to dumpsville? Spot the subtle signs he’s about to jump ship so you can get out before your relationship sinks…
Worried you’re heading to dumpsville? Spot the subtle signs he’s about to jump ship so you can get out before your relationship sinks…
Hung up
Contrary to dating myths men don’t forget to call, they choose not to, even with the excuses you and your friends conjure up from the believable: he’s busy at work, to the unlikely: your text didn’t send. You know messaging only takes a min and if he can’t find time to return your call then he’s not got the time for you. When he starts taking longer to call back, replies with a text or makes every effort to end your phone conversations quickly, it’s time you stopped calling and dialled a new man’s digits.
The (distant) future
Planning things as a pair is part of the fun of being in a relationship - especially pondering over possible romantic holidays that’ll max out your credit card or the dream home you’d need to marry Simon Cowell to own. Nothing spells break up more clearly then a noncommittal attitude especially if he refuses to talk about the future and isn’t interested in going on a dirty weekend next month or doing dinner next week. A man who can’t commit to an event with you in the future is unlikely to have a future with you.
Nit-picking
Banter is brilliant; bickering is boring. If you and your man are doing more of the latter then he’s probably ready to leave. Constant jibes about how long you take to get ready or little under the cuff comments about how you forgot to put the milk back in the fridge are real confidence bashers and something you don’t deserve. But worst of all is when he puts you down in front of other people, it shows he cares more about what they think of him rather than what you do. Find someone who values how you feel.
Face value
Noticed anything different about your man? Is he sporting a new ‘do? Wearing a different wardrobe? Seeing him suddenly start to change his appearance could be a scary sign he’s smartening up his act so he can meet other girls. When the muddy trainers are replaced with polished shoes, it’s time to start worrying as it might be that he’s after a lifestyle change and one that doesn’t involve you.
Poor effort
Remember the early days when you wore your sexiest (and matching) lingerie, went to the pub to watch the footie with your man and always had hairless legs? Fast forward a few months and aren’t these a distant memory? If you’ve reached the comfort zone he may have done too but not in a good way. If he’s happy to be selfish and can’t be bothered to make you lunch or let you watch America’s Next Top Model when Match Of The Day is on then it’s time to find a man who will.
Mr independence
Isn’t independence sexy? Errr yes yes yes. But not so much when he runs away from sharing a shower or would rather go to a mate’s party solo and that happens every week. If the things you used to do together like going for a Sunday roast or drinks on a Saturday he now does alone or with his mates it’s time you became Miss Independence instead.
Fight club
A fight can in fact pump up the passion in your relationship; it can air the things you’ve been dying to say and ends in make up sex – woo hoo! But when you both engage in full on war using every card you’ve got from each other’s insecurities to past arguments you know it’s coming to an end and even more so if the sex stage never materialises. If he can’t back down and say sorry or is happy to argue in public give him the boot first.
No show
Is he as flaky as your morning croissant? Then it’s time to wake up to something else every day. When he starts cancelling on you at the last minute, stops giving you lifts, meeting you after nights out and generally behaves like he’s got something better to do, then he thinks he has. Don’t ignore the signs, you know he’s slipping away and you’re better off slipping into someone else’s arms – preferably ones belonging to a hot man.
Wandering eye
All men look at other women. Fact. Although most men try, even if it is badly, to make sure you don’t catch them in the act. If he’s preparing to break your heart he won’t bother to hide his ogling tendencies. In fact, if he’s too weak willed to break up with you, he’ll try and push you into doing it by being a bad boy. He’ll check out girls and flirt in front of you, mention how hot he thinks celebs are and constantly tells you how many people at work fancy him.
Dip in his drive
When he’s stressed or depressed his performance in the sack will suffer and it’ll also change when things are over. But just because you’re still sleeping together it doesn’t mean your relationship is rock solid. When he wants to leave, he’ll stop initiating sex, be super selfish or give up on foreplay altogether. Don’t deny yourself good sex – get out of this relationship.
Source: Cosmopolitan